GChat Etiquette

If you're in law school, you know gchat. Either you are addicted to it, or you are absolutely terrified that you will be. I can understand, it's just so simple to browse through your friends, check their statuses, "Oh, that's such a cute youtube video of a baby laughing," and whatnot. Even better are those links that don't need sound. What better way to get you through another exciting day of federal tax than this? But after a little time with the glory that is gchat, you may be breaking out your Emily Post wondering: what is proper g-etiquette? 

Short answer: There is none.

Gchat is a no-holds-barred, free-for-all, cliche-ridden schmorgesborg of beat-down. Hate Bush? Link to this. Hate Obama? Post this. Hate someone in your class? Go ahead, set your status to kill, and defame them for your enjoyment of your entire buddy list. Cooking dinner? Let everyone know. Packing for a trip? I bet everyone will be jealous. Taking a dump? Sure, why not? The g-status was twitter before twitter was cool. (Oh, and in case you were wondering: no, twitter is not, and never will be cool. Never in my life could I care enough about yours to receive constant updates about what you are doing. I don't care, he doesn't care, she doesn't care, NO ONE CARES. Put on some shoes and go outside, get you some sun and a hobby.)

"But Godfather," you may ask, "there's this really cute girl in bus org, and I've been g-flirting with her for a while. I think I'm going to g-ask-her-out. Is that allowed?" My answer: of course it's allowed. Like I said, everything is fair game. However, I reserve the right to tell everyone what you did in my status.